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A rather amusing look at "Intelligent Design"

Anime Otaku

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Moderator: We're here today to debate the hot new topic, evolution versus Intelligent Des---


(Scientist pulls out baseball bat.)


Moderator: Hey, what are you doing?


(Scientist breaks Intelligent Design advocate's kneecap.)




Scientist: Perhaps it only appears that I broke your kneecap. Certainly, all the evidence points to the hypothesis I broke your kneecap. For example, your kneecap is broken; it appears to be a fresh wound; and I am holding a baseball bat, which is spattered with your blood. However, a mere preponderance of evidence doesn't mean anything. Perhaps your kneecap was designed that way. Certainly, there are some features of the current situation that are inexplicable according to the "naturalistic" explanation you have just advanced, such as the exact contours of the excruciating pain that you are experiencing right now.


Intelligent Design advocate: AAAAH! THE PAIN!


Scientist: Frankly, I personally find it completely implausible that the random actions of a scientist such as myself could cause pain of this particular kind. I have no precise explanation for why I find this hypothesis implausible --- it just is. Your knee must have been designed that way!


Intelligent Design advocate: YOU *******! YOU KNOW YOU DID IT!


Scientist: I surely do not. How can we know anything for certain? Frankly, I think we should expose people to all points of view. Furthermore, you should really re-examine whether your hypothesis is scientific at all: the breaking of your kneecap happened in the past, so we can't rewind and run it over again, like a laboratory experiment. Even if we could, it wouldn't prove that I broke your kneecap the previous time. Plus, let's not even get into the fact that the entire universe might have just popped into existence right before I said this sentence, with all the evidence of my alleged kneecap-breaking already pre-formed.


Intelligent Design advocate: That's a load of ******** sophistry! Get me a doctor and a lawyer, not necessarily in that order, and we'll see how that plays in court!


Scientist (turning to audience): And so we see, ladies and gentlemen, when push comes to shove, advocates of Intelligent Design do not actually believe any of the arguments that they profess to believe. When it comes to matters that hit home, they prefer evidence, the scientific method, testable hypotheses, and naturalistic explanations. In fact, they strongly privilege naturalistic explanations over supernatural hocus-pocus or metaphysical ****ery. It is only within the reality-distortion field of their ideological crusade that they give credence to the flimsy, ridiculous arguments which we so commonly see on display. I must confess, it kind of felt good, for once, to be the one spouting free-form ********; it's so terribly easy and relaxing, compared to marshaling rigorous arguments backed up by empirical evidence. But I fear that if I were to continue, then it would be habit-forming, and bad for my soul. Therefore, I bid you adieu.

I just aw this on another forum and thought it was soooooo funny :)

Edited by Anime Otaku
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I just aw this on another forum and thought it was soooooo funny :)


It is pretty funny but it annoys me how left wing you are and how you think everyone must accept homosexuality and everyone must be equal blah blah and then you dont accept peoples views on Intelligent Design and then you call Americans dumb and its just stupid.. If your anti-prejudice Taj then at least do it right.

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you call Americans dumb.
I have never ever said Americans are dumb. If you are refering to the story I posted on Draven's forum I was simply saying that the extreme of having children openly indoctrinated as Neo Nazis by a small number of people happening was not a huge surprise as there does seem to me to be far more openess of extreme views in the states, Particularly on the right wing.
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I know, I know, I should've listened at school, but who the hell are these Intelligent design people, at first I thought it had something to do with decorating, but obviously not reading this.


It probably would be funny if i understood intelligent design, but alas it's not.


Although the scientist sounds like Albus Dumbledore, and that thought itself is making me chuckle, hehe! I've got in my head now, it's Albus Dumbledore, smashing the kneecap of George Bush.


hmmmm, yer, i really should have listened it school:(

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