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TWO, I will always love


Kanenite
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Before I start this thread, I would like to say that this is not a sympathy, attention seeking thread, I don't expect people to virtually hug me after this is over.

 

I have just arrived back from my dads and am feeling so depressed, I want to curl up and die. As every time I leave my dads, I am going 200 miles away,I won't see him until Christmas. Every time I leave I am leaving a lot behind, I leave my Dad, my baby Sister, my dads Girlfriend and my precious Dog. This gets me worked up a few days before I actually go back home and I feel like I have no-one to talk to. As I sit here crying over this, it seems that nothing can cheer me up.

 

Me and my Dad have gone through a lot together, back in 2000 my Mum left him for another partner, I was distraught, he was distraught, and it was my worst nightmare. Back then he couldn't cope with all of the bills by himself and went into a lot of debt, this made us both extremely upset. Every time I went to my Dads, I never used to spend time with him, it was always playing out with my friends as I didn't understand back then that my Dad needed all of the company and support he could get. The only thing that seemed to make me feel any better was being with my Dog. We went through a lot of events in 2000 and 2001, we were in a car crash late at night, but we were lucky to escape with just one destroyed car. Late in 2000, he found a new partner, and I hated it, this was my Dad and my Mum going away with different partners while I was suffering with my life falling apart at 10 years old. I didn't want my Dad to be taken away from me, I was jealous that he had someone apart from me, and for that I am so sorry and wish I could have changed. It was my jealousy that caused my Dad and his partner to split up and go seperate ways. It seemed that my Dad was desperate for someone to be his partner, he was socially breaking apart. Yet again he found someone new and I was so jealous yet again, this relationship didn't last long as tragedy struck me and him. He had gone to far into debt and went bankrupt, we lost our house and my Dad had nothing now. What was left now for my Dad? Nothing. The only option he was left with was to move away, to his Mums down in Devon. I couldn't believe that my Dad was leaving me, but he had no other choice. I could only see him on Holidays, but he had changed in a good way a lot. He had a social life and was back on his feet, but he was so lonely. I knew that sometime soon he would find another partner and I was so right. He found someone new, it wasn't long before he had split up with her, due to her lack of support and disrespect to my Dad. She left him one morning without a notice. My Dad was back in the position in 2000 that he had been gradually escaping from. I thought that my Dad would be in this position forever, but he was getting somewhere in life with a new job and he wasn't giving up. This one last time that he had to find a new partner, he has been with for 2 years. They are a great couple and had a baby last November.

 

Anyway enough of that, back onto the point I wanted to make. I have been emotionally scarred today, and I needed someone to talk about this with. The only place where I can let all of my feelings and thoughts free, are with TWO. This is the place where I come to, to let all of my emotions out from deep inside of me. The sadness, the anger, the worries, they have all changed thanks to TWO. I no longer live in fear of being hurt inside and having no-one to talk to about it. In the small 8 months that I have been on TWO, they have helped my life develop and change into what I want it to be. For all of this I thank all of you, you have made me a stronger person and have made me able to talk about problems with people.

 

Thanks to all of you who actually read this, it has been a huge relief to get this off of my chest. I will always love TWO for many of these reasons, and I hope that it stays this way. I am feeling a hell of a lot better and couldn't put any of this in a more simple way than Thankyou TWO.

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its things like this that make me think about how lucky i am, my mum & dad split up when i was about 6 but he still lived a few house's away now we live about 7 miles away from him and i think that im to far away from him, i cant say i understand what your going through because i dont im lucky to still live relativly near all my family so i'd like to say things can only get better kaneite, you'll see, just wait alittle time and things will start to swing your way :xyx
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I live in a broken home kinda dealy myself - four kids from a previous relationship (or two) of Gill's and our own son... it's a powder-keg at the best of times, but everyone hopefully gets by.

 

The thing to remember is there's always someone that knows exactly what you're going through - and your mum and dad probably didn't want this kind of upbringing for you either.

 

Talking - or posting - about it is probably the best thing you can do... I know how hard things can be if you bottle them up and keep them to yourself.

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I also find that TWO helps me take my mind off things aswell, its such a good community where people tend to stick together, I really haven't been to a forum like it before. TWO is a great community and its good to see that you feel you can get things off your chest here.
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Thanks for all of your support, it is greatly appreciated and I am very grateful for it. It's nice to know that i'm not the only one in this situation. Hopefully when I finish up school in 4 years I will be able to see my Dad every month, but at the minute it is very hard to get over there during school time.
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Ach man it's harsh but we're all here for you ! ! You just got to be strong and keep fighting ! So easy to say I know but you got to stick to it ! Hope your feeling a wee bit better soon

 

(ps. Sorry if I say cr@p but I'm terrible in serious situations like this yet want to show my support... kinda' catch 22)

Edited by JobberJoe
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Then he would be 18? I leave next year and ill be 16.

 

You leave school at 16, and then A Levels if you choose to go to College or 6th Form for 2 years so you'll leave at 18. I think nowadays when someone says about leaving school they generally mean at 18, rather than 16.

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My mum and dad split about 10 years ago, alot happened in that period, alot that I dont understand exactly what happened to this day, its a bit too personal to go into on the internet but I probably have had it worse than Kanenite4ever, but everything is fine now and my dad comes round to see me every Sunday and everything is completely fine now.
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My mum and dad split about 10 years ago' date=' alot happened in that period, alot that I dont understand exactly what happened to this day, its a bit too personal to go into on the internet but I probably have had it worse than Kanenite4ever, but everything is fine now and my dad comes round to see me every Sunday and everything is completely fine now.[/quote']

I understand that you don't want to go into detail, it's the same with me, there is much more to my parents splitting but I prefer not to share it at this moment in time.

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