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T-Shirt Slogan's

Cactus Jack

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How Do's,


As you might have guessed from the title, I'm after the funniest T-Shirt slogan's you have seen. I've got a couple which made me have an 'ickle chuckle :lol


"My husband and I divorced over our religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't."


"I work hard because millions on welfare depend on me."


"Finally 18, and legally able to do everything I've been doing since was




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I've currently got a couple of doozies in the rotation.


"I don't drink water, fish %&£$ in it"


"I'm not anti-social, I just don't like you".


Back when Russell Athletic had their main factory in Livingston, Scotland, I was a 2 minute drive away from their overstock discount shop. It was just a place where they could get rid of Russell Athletic clothing which had tiny faults (for example, a thread loose on the inside of the neck, which no one would ever notice) for knockdown prices. Of course, not long after it opened up everyone I knew had Russell Athletic gear. It was then a good passtime of mine to walk around telling people that my dad owned the company.


Anyway, the main attraction of this shop was their T Shirt designer. You picked a plain Russell Athletic T shirt out for about £2 or £3 and put it in their special printer, which was connected to a computer. On the computer there was a bit where you could type in anything, put in a picture from a scanner and print it on your shirt. This obviously was brilliant fun for me and my friends when we were about 13 or 14 to take a fiver from our piggy banks, get the bus to the outlet shop, print a T shirt saying "F*CK YOU", "YOU ARE GAY" or scan in a copy of The Sun's page 3 and manage to get the bus home with change to spare. We'd then walk around town shocking people with the outrageous logos/pictures of topless girls, then due to the ridiculously low prices, put the T shirt in the bin and do it again next week.


I was quite the young scallywag before I discovered the joys of the opposite sex.

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Meat and Cheese do a great range of T Shirts, I have 2 of theirs


"YUM YUM, Panda Burgers, They no just rare, they extinct!"

girls come up to you see the lovely panda then read the slogan!


another one i recently invested in was





I Wanna get the I have F**King Tourettes one as well in time

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My favourate belongs to my sister, she has one with "All this and brains" across the chest!


Another current favourate is


"No I don't fancy you

No I don't want to speak to you

No I don't fancy your mate

No I do not want a threesome

No I do not have a boyfriend

And no I am not a lesbian!"


~Cherry, xxx

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I've seen a few good ones about town.


"F***ing f***kers f***king f***ed" I own this one myself.

"Your just jelous cause the Voices only talk to me"

"I'm with stupid (arrow points upwards)"

"I'm not mad, just ask my multi-coloured camel friend George"

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